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Old 07 Jul 2002, 21:23   #1
Alien
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Who will ease our pain?

A week ago... on the last day of June I lost my younger brother... He's drown... I really can't talk much about it yet... Today is the first day I don't use any tranquilizers... Can't see my parents crying... I've never seen them both crying before... I can't cry anymore... out of tears... I feel that part of myself died...

Did you lose anyone who you loved very much? Tell me how you went through this......




I can see you through...

Edited by - Alien on 07 Jul 2002 22:24:16
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Old 07 Jul 2002, 22:07   #2
Trent
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Alien...I am sorry to hear about your brothers death...as most of you know I lost me brother some time back in a car accident and it was very very hard on me...One thing I can tell you though is that you will never get over it...You can only learn to deal with it...this is something that stays with you forever...the one thing that helped me to deal with me brothers death was writing about it and writing a goodbye letter to him (I wrote this in the form of a poem though) and it helped me a little on the theraputic level...It took me a very long time to come out of the depression from his death...Seumas was me best friend not just me brother...Try and remember the good times you had with your brother...Remember him in a light hearted way...remember him with laughter and smiles and eventually the tears will go away and it will become easier to handle...That's about all I can tell you to do...as everyone grieves differently though and I am not a doctor, but this is how I dealt with Seumas' death and now I can talk about him with a smile instead of breaking down...cause I remember the good times instead of the bad =) I hope for your heart to heal Alien...I hope for this to get better for you and me heart goes out to you!!



"When I close my eyes, I see my soul...When I open them, I see yours"...
Trent
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Old 07 Jul 2002, 22:09   #3
poul e
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This is terrible! I really don´t know what to say.....

I want to write some words to comfort you, but no words I write can ease your pain.

The only thing I can tell you is that I´m here for you if you want to chat with me. Just contact me!



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Old 07 Jul 2002, 22:09   #4
wii
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I´m so sad to read this topic...<img src=icon_smile_sad.gif border=0 align=middle>

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Old 07 Jul 2002, 22:12   #5
russharvey
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Alien!

My heart goes out to you my friend... perhaps there are no words of comfort I can give you right now, these are the times when you need someone to give you a hug, hold your hand and let you cry. Be strong - we are here with you.

***This life is expensive, but at least it comes with a free trip around the sun!***
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Old 07 Jul 2002, 22:27   #6
Avil
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So sorry to hear Elena.
As you might know I lost my grandfather some months ago, and I didn´t know what to do.
I remember my family visiting him one day and I didn´t go with them. I spoiled the chance to meet him one last time, I was so sad. Just because I didn´t come with them to visit him they thought I didn´t care too much.
Noone was there to comfort me, I just sat and cried alone.
Elena, don´t hide your pain as I did.
Cry once more, and then smile, remembering all the joy you shared, even though you argued sometimes (as I do with my little sister)
I also wrote a poem about him: Forever.

There is nothing to do, you can´t bring him back, but he will live in your hearts forever. As many people say, he wouldn´t have wanted you to cry and be sad about this forever, he loved you and wanted you to be happy. Love him, but don´t let your love burry you all.
My heart is with you.

<center> ~/~/~Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, live today~/~/~

a l p h a v i l l e</center>
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Old 07 Jul 2002, 22:30   #7
Alien
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Thank you guys... Trent, Poul, Willy, Russ... Christina too...

We were like one person... We could understand each other without words... And now I feel that he's still here... but I can't see or hear him... He comes to my dreams and tells me that everything's alright... Sometimes I think I'm going crazy... And it hurts so much...

He was only 16...



I can see you through...

Edited by - Alien on 07 Jul 2002 23:43:29
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Old 08 Jul 2002, 00:53   #8
Streetside Romeo
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I dont have words for you that could give real help. I lost my grandfather two years ago and I am afraid I am losing my mother right now, but as I have never dealt with this (my grandpa - I was just like frozen. Strangely never could feel anything deeper on this loss. But for months I was somehow far from myself and my mother - well, I hope that this story will end better than I fear)so far and so closely I can only tell about the fear, not the grief. Perhaps one thing: Remember that future is allways unsure, you never have a guarantee to keep anything, and the moment passes soon. But the beautiful moments you had and have in your heart - noone can take them away from you. Live in the moment, the lucky past in your heart. Try to smile when you see the sun is in the skies. Carry his flag by living your life as you want(ed) it to be.

Forever Young!
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Old 08 Jul 2002, 13:32   #9
leenix
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I am very sorry to read this. It's so sad and there is nothing I can say to ease your pain. I think all you can do for the moment is to let it all out. To come to terms with there things you have to cry, scream, shout. I've seen people internalise and pretend that everything is ok and further down the road they still had to deal with it and mourn properly. You're not alone, we're all here for you.

...---... life will kill you in the end ...---...
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Old 08 Jul 2002, 14:00   #10
Jonatan
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Yes we are!

"I have to follow them – I'm their leader!"
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